Why talking about mental health and stomas matters | by Louise
I’m not afraid to admit that my mental health has been in the gutter for the last two years due to being bed bound thanks to endometriosis and Buddy the cyst. Once I had my hysterectomy I finally admitted to myself that I needed help and I’m still waiting for my EMDR therapy and PTSD counselling as I have medical PTSD. However, my mental health about my stoma has always been absolutely fine and I’m that open. I often get told off by my mother because toilet humour isn’t her cup of tea.
Mental health struggles
So I’ve had medical PTSD since 2009 thanks to a perforated bowel and 3 weeks on life support. I was raised to believe that crying and showing emotions was a weakness, so I have always put what happened to me in a box, in the back of my brain and knuckled down and tried to persevere with life. However, sleeping Louise likes to take everything out of the box and play with chronic insomnia and the whole if I go to sleep, I might not wake up…..
My poor husband has been dealing with my night terrors and insomnia for the last decade and for the sake of his sleep and my sanity I finally approached the GP for help and I’m now awaiting my appointment dates and I’m on Sertraline to help me sleep and keep my moods level.
My stoma
Being diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at the age of 18, I often felt isolated and alone. However, my little brother was also diagnosed with Crohn’s disease 3 years ago so I now have a partner in crime and this has helped both myself and my brother massively as we are each other’s support system. Harrison’s disease is quite severe at the moment and he is potentially going to face stoma surgery if his next round of immunosuppressants don’t quite cut the mustard.
Now I’ve always been open on social media and with my husband about my stoma but I’ve always kept it quiet around my family. Having my brother potentially facing stoma surgery, I did what only a big sister can and spent two days with him showing him how my stoma behaves, what bag life is like and how I change my stoma bag. His response was ‘yours is bloody tiny’ and ‘really if that’s all it is? How can this change my life?’ Will this be easier than the fistula and recurrent perianal abscesses he is suffering with? Helping my brother this way has given me a massive boost because I didn’t have this back in 2009 and I was back then, just fighting to survive and raise my baby daughter. Having a support system with my brother has been absolutely amazing, he doesn’t realise just how much he’s helped me and in a way I hope I have helped him.
The invention of social media
I think social media has played a massive role in helping my mental health with regards to my stoma. What started out as a diary, led to friends and an online support system that I was seriously lacking with my first stoma. Then the most amazing thing in my life happened and I have been an ambassador for Eakin Healthcare since 2017. Going to the Get Togethers and meeting up with the other ambassadors has helped me in so many ways, being with people that are like you and understanding has helped me more than they will ever know. It’s like having a family and a support system you otherwise wouldn’t have.
As always,
Many thanks for reading
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