Eating out with a stoma | by Kevin

Due to travelling with work and having a busy lifestyle I find myself eating out quite a lot of the time. This could be with friends, family or work colleagues. This wasn’t always the case though and when I first had my stoma I would make excuses not to go out.

Dining out at a restaurant

Thefirst time I went out for food at a restaurant after my surgery I felt nervous, what if the bag filled up while I was eating, what foods would upset my stomach or what if my stoma decided to make noises while I was eating. These were all questions I asked myself but didn’t need to worry about.

I’ve learnt a few things that help me in preparation.

Check the menu in advance

I always do this even before I had a stoma as I was always curious of what I could have especially if this was a new restaurant or a cuisine that I had not had before. By checking the menu I can just ensure that there is going to be something that I could tolerate. Over the years I’ve found that as I have introduced more foods I have been able to eat what I like. This may not be the case for everyone but has been my journey.

Eat your food slowly

This has been a challenge for me as I have always been a quick eater and since having my stoma I have begun to realise that just taking the extra time to chew the food helps as this transitions through your body. By taking your time also helps to create less air that is swallowed while eating and helps with less gas in your bag.

Portion sizes

I do try to watch potion sizes and manage how much food im taking in at one time. By allowing the food to be broken down and in smaller portions helps with the transition through the digestive system. When I first had my stoma I would eat as I used to do with buig meals not realizing this was causing me to have blockages. I found that if I eat little and often this is a better way for me to manage my intake.

Where are the toilets

I always like to ensure I know where the toilets are when I go out to eat, through experiences I now always carry a radar key for me to access some of the accessible / disabled toilets. By ensuring I know where they are I can feel comfortable that if I need to do a bag change or empty my bag im not waiting to ask where they are and giving myself the best chance of confidently knowing where to go if there is an emergency.

One of the huge things I needed to get out my head was that no one is interested in you and they don’t know about your bag. I was stuck on the fact that people knew I had a stoma or they were looking at me and my bag filled up but realistically they have no clue and not remotely interested.

Planning

When I go out with family or friends its always good to discuss before what you are comfortable with eating, when I first started going out for food after my surgery I would eat very bland food mushy if possible and not at all appealing. As I have been able to manage my eating and food intake we go out and enjoy all cuisines, this may not be the case for everyone but it really is trial and error and building up the confidence in what you like to eat and enjoy.

At the beginning of my journey with my stoma, I would take a spare bag of supplies and ensure I had everything that I needed incase of an emergency. As time has gone on and confidence in having a stoma and going out eating I don’t carry any spares with me.

The more outings I’ve gone on, I’ve realised and gained control back from a condition that I let manage me.

Eating with a stoma does come with its challenges but it doesn’t have to hold you back. Preparation, self awareness and confidence make all the difference, Whether it’s a quiet dinner or a lively gathering I remind myself that food is just one part of the experience and it’s the connections made with family and friends that last a lifetime and make you realise the importance.

Kevin
@thestomaguy